Nothing's Changed, Actually ~ Tho I had hoped It Would

For many months now, I have been thinking about the Hillary sticker on my car window.  It is as if the longer it would be there, the more assured her presidency.  Do I have to look for a razor blade today?  I suppose.  I am the, THE demographic; a white woman, college graduate, in a nice neighborhood, a reasonable car and almost 60.  In my imagination, people will look and think I am addlepated leaving it on when, in fact, I am resistant and conscious of what might have been. 

And now I am faced with having to make a switch.  I feel like someone is asking me to be straight.  After years as a lesbian and many more identifying as a bi-sexual, how can they be asking me to be straight again?  I am a bigot; I want women to run the world.  Yes, progressive women, to be sure, but women nonetheless.  It was so close, here in the most violent country on earth, where we need it more than ever. 

My personal history was that I awoke to the civil rights movement before the women’s movement.  I am thinking that I am going to have to reach deep into my heart-story and remember who I was in 1968, protesting, marching, booing George Wallace, wearing a Humphrey button, the DNC in Chicago, Kent State, etc.  The Democratic nominee being a Black man would have been revolutionary, exciting and a dream come true.  It would have been before reading Friedan, before De Beauvoir, before Abbott & Love, before Sisterhood Bookstore, before Roe, before my first abortion, before my first lesbian kiss, before joining NOW, before truly understanding what it means that women are not in the US Constitution, before Houston, before Beijing – before I became me really.
 
So I will scrape the Hillary sticker off my Honda.  I will vote for the Democratic nominee and I will get back to work and do what I do everyday; everything and anything I can do to be of service to the American Women’s Movement.   

As I wrote a year ago ~

For me, tomorrow, nothing is going to change.
Tomorrow I will do what I do everyday.

I wake up, I get out of bed and work to advance women.
I do it with my blog
I do it with demonstrations
I do it promoting the ERA
I do it protesting oppression

Tomorrow I will do what I do everyday.

I will buy and read every book I can afford on feminism.
I will crawl the web for every item that is by ~ for or about women.
I will encourage every female to be all she can be and to exceed even her own expectation.

Tomorrow I will do what I do everyday.

Fundamentally, for me, tomorrow nothing is going to change.
Tomorrow I will do what I do everyday.

Comments

[diane]

Thanks from my heart, Zoe. I had similar thoughts looking at the Hillary button sitting in my drawer this morning. I still have my Gore Lieberman sticker too and can't help but ponder how different the world might look today with them at the helm for the last eight years (if lieberman didn't become a trader).
The upshot is that we will continue to strive for our steadfast hopes and dreams of a gentler more compassionate world, where all beings are equal. We will live and work at it everyday because the this truth is at our core. Even the last eight years and this primary can't erase such a worthy aspiration.
As the Buddha said "Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth"