OnLine With Zoe

Principles of NOW Brought to Light

Sent to
Lindsey Horvath
Melinda Tremaglio
Yvonne Golub
Shelly Mandell
And the NOW Grievance Committee

I hope this is the last time that I email to this particular grouping of women as we came together over a most unfortunate circumstance.  The NOW Grievance process may look egalitarian on paper, but in practice is has nothing to do with feminism or matriarchy. 

Frankly, so many extenuating circumstances whirled around this event that it was best to simply draw it down, dim the light and shut the door.  I believe it is really not the responsibility of neighboring chapters to defend the 6 priorities of NOW; it should have come from the National office.  For me, the right thing to do was for the NOW PAC to have made a strong statement last October regarding mixed messages about any high visibility member/leader being seen on a stage with Gov Palin.  In the absence of that intelligence, four very smart women felt compelled to do it for themselves.

It should have remained between them and Ms. Mandell and a non-biased trio of feminists, whose job is supposed to be holding a safe space for a working resolution to organically rise.  As the weeks poured forth, it became murky, crowded and loaded with people pushing in where they do not belong.  Each of us heard terrible gossip that so-in-so was driving this and we were puppets.  Let me be very clear, anyone one who thinks we were puppets, certainly does not know us at all.  At all.

So today I hear that the National Board is all up in arms about a press conference we held today.  Let the hens cluck, they are the ones who formed the PAC, endorsed Barack Obama, would not take a stand on Governor Palin and tried endlessly to insert themselves in the grievance and interfere in the mediation process. 

This press conference did what no one else would do; take a definitive stand on the six principles of NOW
1. stopping violence against women
2. promoting diversity & ending racism 
3. advancing reproductive freedom
4. winning lesbian rights 
5. achieving constitutional equality
6. ensuring economic justice

Back off you meddlers, be silent you gossipers, take note you grievers, be humbled you revenge seekers.  Today 5 women, who really have only one thing in common, came together to speak of their love for NOW. 
Show some respect.

Eulogy for Dr. George Tiller

DELIVERED AT CONGREGATION KOL AMI, WEST HOLLYWOOD, JUNE 3, 2009

Thank you for this opportunity to speak in this meeting of the spirit.  Most often we are speaking at political events, when we make a point to not mention the spirit and soul.  Now, here at this beautiful Synagogue, Congregation Kol Ami, we can talk of the spirit. 

First I want to tell you that when I was forty-four and my reading eyes weren't what they used to be, I missed the tiny stamped expiration date on a birth control product that had been in my drawer for over ten years and, to my surprise, I found myself pregnant.  I went to a clinic in New York and, as required by law, was counseled by a health care worker who happened to be half my age.  I had to tell her that I had used my birth control but did not know that it could expire. 

The next day I came back to be assisted by women, at the door, at the desk, in the OR.  When the procedure was over I put out my hand and said thank you.  The doctor, a bit bemused, removed his glove and shook my hand.  I explained that I had been a free clinic director and I know the danger they live in every day.  I wanted to thank him for his service to women. 
 
I am telling you this to encourage you that if you have had an abortion; please talk about it, give others the opportunity to ask you about it.  Take the opportunity to tell them that it has not destroyed your life.  The decision was neither tragic or trivial.  Peel off the stigma and shame.  Openly discuss that all facets of reproductive health are part of every woman’s life. 

Second I want to tell you in this ecumenical gathering, I am a Buddhist and I do not believe in heaven or hell.  (That’s a relief!)  That doesn't make abortion easier ~ just different.  I believe that an independent soul enters a human body with breathe, as most scriptures describe.

Also I believe in reincarnation. I believe that people are born to the next life based on what they designed through their previous life and the circumstances of their death.  (It is not lost on me that another great soul died in prayer, by a point blank shooting, M.K.Gandhi.) 

I believe that George Tiller’s soul is in that place between the worlds planning the next life.  This is one daydream I hold about Dr Tiller’s soul ~ Sometime in the future a little girl will be born.  She will be healthy and smart.  In  her world, women will have irrevocable domain over their bodies, birth control will be free and reliable, women who become pregnant will be able to make private informed choices with safe, loving care by well-paid professionals.

As a life-long activist, the question always arises, “what is our action item?”  Today’s action item is to create such a world so this American Mahatma, this Great Soul, deserves to come back to. 

American Idol From My POV

Last night’s American Idol was an extraordinary show.  I sat on the couch with the poodle, skipping through the commercials having a great time.  The last few minutes sucked, as we all know Adam Lambert is the more talented, long term idol but that’s what happens when voters are little Christian girls who dream of Kris Allen being their friend, singing to them on their thirteenth birthday.  Hell, all us older girls (over 17)  and gay/bi guys, who want Adam to sing to us on any birthday, just didn’t vote – “vote, we don’t need no stinkin’ votes!”

The insight that bowled me over and is still powering through my day, began with Cyndi Lauper and Allison Iraheta.  Sitting knee-to-knee, singing Time After Time, led me to feel thrilled for Allison, thrilled out of her mind.  It just seemed glorious, unimaginably glorious to be next to her idol; almost appearing to be peers; knowing their are not in one way and clearly equal in another.  Of course they are links in a chain of artistry and we had a front row seat.  The TV show included, among others,  Lionel Richie with Danny Gokie, Queen Latifah with Lil Rounds and Adam Lambert with KISS.  These pairs are runners in the relay of music. 

I wondered who I would like to meet.  Who have I met that handed me a baton?  Names poured though my mind; Mary Daly, Sally Miller Gearhart, Kate Millet, Barbara Love, Gloria Steinem, Grace Welch, Riane Eisler, Flo Kennedy, Dr. Joseph Lowery, Jacqui Ceballos, Margie Adam  and so many more.  The reason I could feel so much for these contestants was because I have sat knee-to-knee with my inspiration. 

What am I doing to hand off this baton before my time is over?  There is lots of conversation within the American Women’s Movement about “intergenerational feminism.”  American Idol made me really question the uproar.  I doubt if Allison felt that Cyndi was too old to be playing with her, even though Cyndi was playing an old fashioned Appalacian dulcimer.  Carlos Santana, Queen, Rod Stewart were sure not presented as old and out of date. 

In the world of feminism, I think the problem is identifying the baton.  My experience is that older women think the baton is the message imbedded in their tried and true methods and, for the most part, the methods are entirely out of date.  For younger women, the message and the methods are not what they need or can use. 

The real baton is courage, insight and passion.  Older to younger, experienced to newbie, seer to seeker, this entire conversation will change both in content and context when the baton is properly identified as energy ignited with wisdom ~ not message or methods.  They are specific to each activist, each generation and not required for the movement to continue.  Insisting that the methods and message are the baton is short-sighted and counter-productive.  As Kara Dioguardi said it all season, true artistry is taking a classic and making it your own. 

Find Some Balance ~ Roe v Wade is Going to Explode

If you watched Meet the Press today, ( no I did not get up at that hour, I TIVO’ed it) you heard that a new Gallup poll said that, for the first time, the majority of US adults identify as pro-life.  In fact it is now 52%.  It is not lost on me that the President did not keep his campaign promise to pass the Freedom of Choice Act.  Some may recall that NARAL endorsed Obama/Biden.  I can’t help but wonder what they are thinking today.

I have to admit that I am really enjoying participating in the Marriage Equality movement.  I am not used to working on a movement that is on a roll, that is national, that has reached its tipping point.  It is thrilling; exhilarating.  It is finding leaders and heroes.  Have you heard of Lt. Dan Choi and his organization, Knights Outs?  Join with them, donate to them and demand that Obama repeal DADT.   Obama did write a note to 2nd Lt. Sandy Tsao; Thanks for your wonderful and thoughtful letter. It is because of outstanding Americans like you that I committed to changing our current policy. Although it will take some time to complete ( partly because it needs Congressional action ) I intend to fulfill my commitment!    Get on board with this movement and push this wave.  It is uplifting to feel momentum! 

You need to establish some balance because the whole country is about to split and spit and kick and yell as the Supreme Court appointment is announced and debated.  The wild protesters outside of Notre Dame today are just a small sample of the wicked ugly zeal the anti-choice people thrive on.  I have stood many, many times, toe-to-toe with anti-choice people and they simply confound me.  I cannot imagine standing on a corner holding a photo of a saline burned fetus ~ what would that feel like?  Frankly if I was anti-choice, I would want posters that were easy to look at, radiant with prana, ~~ but oh, wait that vibration is pro-choice, pro-liberation, pro- freedom.

While circling the Circle of Orange at the 2008 Roe v. Wade Demonstration I had the most interesting experience.   Usually I march in silence and occasionally I feel inspired to stop and say a decade of the rosary with a Catholic family.  Obviously it is fun to demonstrate that love of the rosary is not the private property of the anti-choice people.  As I was standing still, a woman walked up to me and asked if my name is Zoe.  “Yes, it is.” I replied.  She went on to explain that she had been in my NOW chapter in the 70’s.   I asked her how she came to change her mind about abortion and she told me that it happened from watching a show on the Discovery Channel about fetal development.  Seeing the formation of a hand, a heart, was what it took for her to become an advocate for the anti-choice movement.  The entire time we talked, we held hands.  Her teenage children were horrified that their mother was friendly with a pro-choice (baby-killer)  person.

I love that moment.  I am proud of that moment.  She recognized me and felt she could speak with me.  I must have been open that night; open to any and all.  I am very much aware that I am often not open but this moment made it clear that I am capable of it; so much so it is perceivable by an opponent.  What is on the horizon scares me a bit, concerns me a bit,  the country is going to argue and claim ownership of god and goodness and trust and liberty.  I need to be balanced, stand silently in the face of violence and hold my heart open. 

"Health Insurers Agree to End Higher Premiums for Women"

I never intended to be a one note person and, chances are you know I am not, but this ERA thing keeps pouring through me.  I am absolutely certain that the explicit inclusion of all genders in the US Constitution will change the fundamental vibration of my country and, thus, the world.  It is easy to understand when I consider how it feels now without the ERA.  We kill people, thousands of people, to force countries to include all genders but here, it seems to be VERY important to NOT include everyone, as it has not passed in 86 years. 

It upsets me that I get pigeon-holed both by issue and age on this.  It is easy to perceive.  Dismissive people may think it is masked; be assured it is not.  What is the thinking on this?  That it is trivial?  Tired of listening?  Oh, pro-ERA people are dam tired of it and proof of its importance is easier to demonstrate everyday. 

New York Times, May 6, 2009, “WASHINGTON — Insurance companies offered Tuesday to end the practice of charging higher premiums to women than to men for the same coverage."  Maybe this admission by Karen M. Ignagni, president of America’s Health Insurance Plans, a trade group, before the Senate Finance Committee did not register on your rector scale but it should.  Feminists have been writing, speaking, protesting about this for many, many years and, more importantly, the gender disparity held by health insurance companies has been identified as the primary obstacle to the ERA. 

Ellie Smeal explained that the ERA wasn’t lost in the public square, but behind closed doors ~ Insurance companies, banks, and other corporate interests thought the amendment would be bad for business.  Insurance companies would no long be able to charge women higher health insurance premiums, deny pregnancy coverage, or pay less on women’s annuity plans because of a longer lifespan.  Banks would have to give credit to women on an equal basis. 

Charging women more for insurance, covering Viagra and not birth control pills; simply put ~ fining women for their biology is BIG BUSINESS.  And big business means very big campaign donations.   I know there are campaigns for the Equal Rights Amendment going on in non-ratified states.  I know people are spending hours and dollars working on legislators to pass the amendment in three more states. 

But this news, that the insurance companies may charge people equally, may just be the lifting of the biggest obstacle to realizing my dream of the ERA. 

Working on my Racism

As you can see in the blog below, the National Women's Law Center posted a correction in the comments.  I just cannot stop thinking about it.  Like hundreds of others, I signed up to blog on Fair Pay Day about the significance of the day.  God knows we need information about the wage gap and, surprisingly, that the day is not a celebration as so many seem to think.  It is not a holiday; it is a significator of hard work reaping different values based on sex.  It is based on the number 77.8 %.  The short hand of it is that a man and woman who start working fulltime on January 1, 2008, it will take the woman working to April 28, 2009 to make the money a man made by December 31, 2008.

I can remember carrying signs that said 59 and 63 cents so, now, to see this increase to 77.8 is slow but growing increase.  This has been a real pillar of my talks.  I tell college students that they borrow at the same rate but have to pay back with this disparity.  And a two adult household of gay men makes 200% but two lesbians make 156%.  And that a husband and wife working make 178%, etc.  Then I would look around the room and, with shame and alarm, I would say that Black and Latina women make even less with their gender compounded with their race.  I thought I was taking responsibility for the racial inequity.  But hidden in the top amount of 77.8 is a racism that I cannot stop thinking about. 

As I was told yesterday, 77.8 is not what I can make as a white woman.  White women make 81%.  After all of the years carrying a sign with this all important number I find out that this is the AVERAGE of what women make which, obviously, means that the disparity between the races is not only worse and wider but HIDDEN in this averaging.  I am just furious about this.  I am just in tears about this - I have participated in this amalgam of obfuscation, not that I think it is intentional but its not clear, not honest and carries a callousness that we, as caring people, have to examine.

As an activist, I often throw around the room the proper axiom that we are only as advanced as our least; how we care for the least is how we care for all; we can be known by how we treat the least among us.  There are so many ways to say it that it is attributed to King, Gandhi, Jesus, etc.  But how can we ever make this determination if it is all rolled into one?  Wouldn't the right thing be to go with the least?  Isn't the real wage gap the White men and Latina women = 41 cents?  The signs should read 59 cents.

Over the last year I have been giving some of my time to the Marriage Equality Movement, not without some internal conflict.  Let's face it the best thing to do would be to delete marriage from governmental lexicon entirely but, in any event, it is about equality and I deeply believe in that.  However I am concerned that the masses of men and women, upon winning the right to marry and have unencumbered access to over a thousand rights, will consider the job done and stop participating in the work for equality.  The men will go home the victors and the women will still be earning less, under represented, missing from the Constitution and this evasive, all important, equality will still be be needing advocates. 

One man who knew this was Harvey Milk.  He insisted on including women in politics and society.  (memo to Lance Black - what were you thinking??)  Just as Gloria Steinem will speak on a panel only if Women of Color are seated also.  Over 40 years of carrying signs about the wage gap and today, TODAY, I crack open in seeing that even my sign was racist.  I am not guilty.  I am not wrong.  I am evolving.

Well, You Asked What I Think About the ERA Movement.

I got an email today from a friend who lives in an eastern state.  She had read Frank Riches' op-ed piece, The Bigots' Last Hurrah and asked what the ERA Movement could learn from the Marriage Equality burgeoning success.  Here is my answer ~

I am spending most of my activist time these days on marriage equality – as it has reached the tipping point and cannot be stopped – the lever has been sprung in all of the Western world.  Backlash is ugly but they are desperate.

You may find it interesting that on April 4 I gave an ERA presentation at an Equality organization to celebrate ( a bit late) women’s history month.  I expanded my talk to include the movie, Milk and its drastic exclusion of Milk’s work with women which, in fact, was extensive.  Several men walked out – they were perturbed that the monthly meeting was being wasted on a “women’s issue.”  Of course they were the minority but LGBTQQAI are on the march, on the run, seeing their life-long issue reaching the fulcrum.  I don’t think they were anti-me or anything but, rather, anti-letting the traction slip.  (No, I am not naïve on this – I know men rarely take on issues perceived and labeled as women’s issues.)

I am 60 years old and with a MA in religion, went to professional computer school in 1985.  I mention that to illustrate that I have a foot in each of the waves.  My white hair gives away that I worked in the Second Wave (1963-1875) and my knowledge of electronic social networking, viral marketing and the E-Highway lets me travel freely in the Third Wave. 

Yes, the gay movement has busted through the backlash majority.  I caution you to know that many high school kids are still being harassed and commit suicide.  But all the Mormons cannot get the anti-gay movement back on track.  Four states, many countries, and, what cannot be denied, the next generation thinks the whole issue is ridiculous.  Teenagers tell their parents that once they die – it will all be moot.

So look closely at that perfect collection of facts and see exactly what the ERA movement does not have.
1) National attention.
2) The pro-states coalescing and casting a shadow on their lagging neighbors.
3) The new generation thinks it is simple justice.
4) Total use of the E-Highway (texting, facebook, youtube, twitter, ning, etc.)  as utilized by Obama’s campaign.
5) Undeniable visibility.

I am happy for the African American community and the great advances that an African American President means.  I am happy for the Queer community as they deserve full Marriage Equality.  These two real successes show us that the majority can come together, become involved and advance social justice.  They did not do it legislator by legislator.  They did it by making the cause attractive, available and obvious to the common, simple hard-working American.

The benefits of the ERA are obvious but not part of the national conversation.  I do not understand why 35 states and the clear majority of Americans should not be rallied but, rather, leave it to the 15 non-ratified states to be lobbied, yet again.  To me, it would be like the Queer movement trying to get Utah on board – what an ineffective and exhausting  effort.

I hear that the ERA is not sexy, it not exciting.  That is so not true.  NOT TRUE.  Just tell college women that they have to pay off their loans, credit debt and mortgages while making 78 cents on the dollar.  Tell them that insurance pays for viagra and not for the pill.  Just tell them that they are still considered 3/4s of a citizen.  Actually all you have to do is tell them it did not pass.

New Favorite Book - The Means of Reproduction

I first read about The Means of Reproduction at RHRealityCHeck.org in an interview of Michelle Goldberg by Mandy Van Deven. I ordered it immediately and had to wait for it to arrive on April 4. This book is landing in our march toward reproductive intelligence, liberty and health at precisely the right moment. While social justice is unfolding; the backlash is mounting, gasping its last breaths, this book is rich with vision and understanding.

American women need to understand the reach of their influence, their dollars and their personal religion. There are places in the world where pregnancy and childbirth can be punishment, torture and deadly, US policies are contributing through policies and funding certain programs, unfunding others, gag orders and relinquishing responsibility to religious organizations.
Michelle explains all of this and more, making it clear how decisions in Washington DC or a neighborhood clinic end up practiced in Africa or India with no understanding of the cultural consequences.

The Means of Reproduction is brilliant, responsible and approachable. I highly recommend it. Finally a book that makes it clear that American women, with all our freedom, need to commit to provide women world-wide with comprehensive birth control information and methods.  
 
You can find Michelle on Facebook too.

My Email Today

From: zoe@onlinewithzoe.com [mailto:zoe@onlinewithzoe.com]
Sent: Wednesday, March 11, 2009 12:11 PM
To: Jenny Boshears
Subject: Pro- ERA

 

Dear Governor Beebe,

It would be so terrific if Arkansas stood up and took the informed responsible position on the ERA.   Please note ~

·         Over 85% of Americans want the ERA

·         ERA has nothing to do with the draft

·         ERA has nothing to do with abortion or marriage

Take a stand on the side of the informed majority and encourage the Arkansas legislature to pass the ERA.

Thank you,

Zoe Nicholson

 

From: Jenny Boshears [mailto:Jenny.Boshears@governor.arkansas.gov]
Sent: Wednesday, March 11, 2009 10:14 AM
To: zoe@onlinewithzoe.com
Subject: RE: Pro- ERA

Thank you for contacting the Office of Governor Mike Beebe.  Because of long-standing policy guidelines, the Governor does not answer mail electronically, but he has seen your message and appreciates your concerns. The Governor has been a long-time supporter of the Equal Rights Amendment and has personally spoken to Senator Glover and others about this important issue.  He joins you in working for its passage and urges you to contact your state senator.

Time for Arkansas to Ratify the ERA

You may already know that Phyllis Schlafly’s organization deluged the Arkansas legislature with their usual ocean of fear and lies about the ERA; turning a deciding committee vote over last weekend.  Now is the time to tell them the truth; that most Americans want the ERA, it is in the national platform and to join the 35 states that have ratified equality for women and men. 

Contact the Governor by email and phone call today.
Email Governor Beebe of Arkansas at
tonya.mercer@governor.arkansas.gov OR jenny.boshears@governor.arkansas.gov
or call 501-682-2345

Let Governor Beebe know that we appreciate his help in asking Senator Glover to vote for the ERA at least in committee or to find someone else to carry the bill.  It would be a proud moment for Arkansas to become the 36th state to ratify the ERA.