Clearly I can keep a secret. I was not clear on any other component though. Oddly, what really threw me was the crew constantly asking me, “Are you prepared for her to be dead?” At first it was shocking. Why would we be doing all of this if she had passed? Then it was annoying and I wanted to say, yes I hear you. Yes, I am prepared.
The time it really threw me was when Ann Curry asked me. The question must be real if Ann Curry is asking me on camera. My answer to Ann was, I think you will understand more than the crew. I am a Buddhist. We are always aware of impermanence, of age, of death. I do know she is a bit older than I am. The fact was, I had no idea where she is or what she is doing. The shoot continued which could only mean that no matter the circumstances, it was not going to impede us.
The question I kept asking was, Can I tell people? OH NO. No, you cannot share your photos. You can not talk about this on social media. You cannot say who you are looking for. You cannot tell people if you find her. Heck, most of the time they didn’t even tell me where we were going. I got a text the night before. (virgo, cap rising - steadfast, premeditated, strategic). My mantra for all 14 days was ~ surrender.
When can I tell people? The funny thing here is that everyone I asked, anyone I asked, had a very different answer. The possibility of error was maddening. The PBS USA office said, I could reveal anything five minutes after they did. The sole caveat was that the photos I shared could not include the crew. So that’s what I did. Remember, I have not seen the show. It was all like describing a gift before you open it. In tiny increments, PBS USA revealed this and that. I followed their lead.
Breathe. Show and Tell. I was hoping to meet Sonia Johnson again. I had not seen her for 36 years. We parted in the Springfield airport and neither of us was well. Though I didn’t realize it at the time, I was not just saying goodbye to my sister fasters but also our standing guard. AND goodbye to the ERA.
Finally, Day 14. There she was. – you will have to watch to get the whole story as I traveled to 5 states, recapitulated my summer of 1982, and met up with my Mentor.
PBS, We'll Meet Again
Tuesday, January, 8, 9/8c
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