OnLine With Zoe

This Frail Power, the Vote.

I never wanted the vote to be this powerful. Change happens in the soul, expressed through art, absorbed into culture. Law enforcement and legislature have no understanding that they are last to be moved.

I blame the pandemic for the escalating power of the vote in 2020. Without the pandemic people would not be so physically at risk. The pandemic attacked the right to assemble. The pandemic attacked the middle class and working poor. Protest would have been deeply, widely, strident, if not for the pandemic.

People of Color have put so much on the line in massively disrespecting the pandemic to rip the the opera gloves off of white america and teach us to "say their name." Bravery unparalleled. Massive human debts that can never be repaid because the heartless bankers don't believe they owe.

Women raped, discarded, beaten, diminished and handed a paper mask to care for the infected dying. Mothers forced to teach as a form of protecting their family. Technology imposing another layer of caste.

Now, the electeds must tell us the truth. No more hollow promises. It is all on the voters. Do not look to government for directions, health information, leadership, temporary assistance, stimulus, protection or basic humanity.

Beyond anything Suffragists could have imagined we are left with this tiny, frail, hash mark and finger ink. We are voting for democracy, for air, for water, for life herself. It is a terrible burden, probably dangerous, but it is ours.

I Vote for my Party

I am not voting for Joe Biden. I am voting for my party. I have always voted for my party. I rarely care for the presidential nominee, nor do I vote for them in the primary. I vote for my party. I hold my party responsible for advancing someone to that position. I see no point to debate publicly about the person but, rather, the party.

 

I am a Democrat. I have always been a Democrat. Growing up in a passionate Goldwater house, being 16 in 1964, supporting labor, anti-war, pacifist; I chose my party. I live in a two-party system. I am realistic about my vote and a dreamer about how things should be. No one has ever come close to that, though Stacey Abrams is closest so far.

 

The Republican party (party of Miss Paul), has been purchased, possibly blackmailed because of their lurid behavior or just unbridled greed. They lost their direction by not nominating a Republican. Their misogyny blinded them. They racism fueled them. They are now being led by a fascist. I have no idea how they or if they will get their party back but, in fact, I do not care. GOP is not my tribe, my club, my affair, my student, my teacher, or the holder of my dreams.

 

Now their opposing party, my party, is in a serious battle for saving the constitution, the party, the people; We the People. I am not happy with the nominee but I do not vote for a personality, a person, a biography; I vote for my party. I care vehemently about my party holding the Executive and Legislative branches.

 

My preference is to vote for women. Women have proven, that when women hold a preponderance of seats in any organization, the patriarchal agenda begins to lose its grip. Even GOP women change as they are at greater liberty when men do not hold the awards/rewards, the paycheck, the possibility of advancement.

 

Voting for women offers a much great chance of not voting for a sexual predator, be they calculated or just plain asleep. I am not going to hold a debate on Biden’s pro-women legislation vs. his total lack of boundaries. I do expect the leaders of my party, the Democratic party to get him in check, hold him in check and face their bad choice squarely.

 

Of course, men, white men, think that only a white man can beat a white man. However, they seem to have, 1) stepped away from naming the incumbent evil and insane 2) gotten fatigued managing backlash stemming from a Black man going in the front door of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

 

I am fatigued with my party talking about race and gender and then nominating a white man. I am not voting for Joe Biden. I am voting for my party. It is the party of the people. And, once again, voting since 1972, the nominee is not my choice. I will vote BLUE.

Mother Earth has Put Us on Notice

#TEAWITHZOE

There is some mysterious movement afoot. I have no idea what it is. Fact is we are killing the planet, women, children, families, air, water, land. Mother Earth has put us on notice. The opponent is genius as it forbids us to gather; we have lost the right and power to assemble. The opponent cares nothing about race, class, gender, education, etc., but the treatment of Americans in the hands of this crisis, demonstrates all of these divides.

Women are at the front lines of the pandemic. Women are the majority of educators, 80% of healthcare providers, the hands-on workers in the "essential" businesses and primary parent, all the while being discriminated against in the "bailouts"  Women are in danger both from double exhaustion and sequestered in a boiling pot of abuse with no escape.

There has never been a more obvious time to see the need for equal wages, equal benefits, equal pensions. Forgiveness of student loans does not remedy the lifetime of unequal wages paid for equal degrees paired with equal debt.

Climate conditions have been the Mother's ultimate warning signal; hard to breathe, poisoned water, decimated land. Possibly this is a global call for the patriarchy to clear out and die; a short time for practitioners of the patriarchy to end their rule. The ultimate "#timesup." Eh, a girl can dream.

But Nothing will change my mind. #womenwillsavetheworld - if it can be saved. Women have been trying for a very long time. Actually, we will never stop. #teawithzoe
photo credit Jose Cordon

A Patchwork in Search of a Quilt

As the Women's March is fast approaching, I spent some time reading about the breakups, spats, legitimate arguments, the oppression olympics, the misuse of the word intersectional, the single river splintering into tributaries of self-importance.  All of it is right on time.  Entropy does not only apply to taking a car off the lot or putting a brand-new couch in the living room.  The visionary’s image is clear at inception, the founders embody it and. as it spreads out into more people's consciousnesses, it dilutes rather than reducing into something stronger. 

When I began devouring American Women’s History, it was because I was in the middle of a profound fight for women’s rights.  I wanted to know more about the ERA’s Visionary and understand the obvious entropic degradation to its, then, current status.  What I learned is still unfolding.  Thirty-six years of reading and six of which are dogged, heads-down study is still not enough to fully understand but, certainly, gives me some particular insight.  It also gives me a lot more questions than answers as answers are deeply perishable, dependent on their ineffable environment.   Maybe historians can tell us about life a hundred years ago but never can they measure heart.

The Visionary is all heart, often ignited by an epiphany; as was the case for Alice Paul, Gerda Lerner, Oscar Romero, Mohandas Gandhi and Francis of Assisi. It was not a low boil as was the case with Theresa of Avila or John of the Cross or Robert Greenleaf or Bill W.  The poet slowly peels.  The Visionary is thrown off the horse, stuck by lightening which makes it impossible to measure or ignore.  They are lit up and, regardless of its solitary revelation, must proceed. 

Following the provenance of the idea of liberating American women, there were a handful of spiritual women, mostly Quaker, inspired by the Iroquois, who coalesced a vision over a cup of tea.  Importantly, one essential question remains, liberating from what?  Simply put; invisibility, unpaid labor, non-citizenship, living a relative existence with zero agency.  They were either unrealized or holding varying degrees of realization with proportionate agony.  Let this be stated squarely, the Visionary suffers with seeing full possibility while painfully trying to pare it down to fit the, “conscience of the day,” in hopes of sharing it.

My expertise is studying and testing the heart of Miss Alice Paul.  She was struck with one single insight that never diluted in her 92 years.  She saw that American women will never realize the possibility of society’s equality without explicit, absolute equality in the US Constitution.  She was smart enough to know that the vote was a required stop on the road but never the destination. 

Miss Paul had something that no one today has, no one.  She was absolutely absolute.  Not only was she single-focused but it was irresistible.  Women, old and young, took her direction as orders.  Moreover, they wanted to be trusted with those orders.  Women who had barely spoken in their own parlors, stepped onto truck beds with flyers in hand to speak in open air about their rights, all because Miss Paul’s “violet eyes,” asked them to. 

Perhaps the first woman who posted on Facebook, in November of 2016 calling for a Women’s March, was inspired but it was never a sole vision, with a sole purpose.  Within days it was diluted, distributed, dissected, and the suffocation of entropy was in full swing.  Millions of women with their specific ideas of liberation, of resistance, of protest took the street.  2017 and 2018 held banner marches and 2019 will as well but banners will have many colors, many causes, many agendas.  Each will indicate a fissure, a separate understanding of liberation based on an interpretation and assignment of oppression.

I believe Miss Paul would advise that all of those tributaries would have a more prosperous future if one single item was won; full explicit irrevocable inclusion in the US Constitution.  Her vision assigned a wise priority.  Without that we are but a patchwork in search of a quilt.

As William Carlos Williams wrote,

so much depends
upon
the red wheel barrow

glazed with rain
water

beside the white
chickens

 

Secrets I Long to Tell

Clearly I can keep a secret.  I was not clear on any other component though.  Oddly, what really threw me was the crew constantly asking me, “Are you prepared for her to be dead?”  At first it was shocking.  Why would we be doing all of this if she had passed?  Then it was annoying and I wanted to say, yes I hear you.  Yes, I am prepared.

The time it really threw me was when Ann Curry asked me.  The question must be real if Ann Curry is asking me on camera.  My answer to Ann was, I think you will understand more than the crew.  I am a Buddhist.  We are always aware of impermanence, of age, of death.  I do know she is a bit older than I am.  The fact was, I had no idea where she is or what she is doing. The shoot continued which could only mean that no matter the circumstances, it was not going to impede us. 

The question I kept asking was, Can I tell people?  OH NO.  No, you cannot share your photos.  You can not talk about this on social media.  You cannot say who you are looking for.  You cannot tell people if you find her.  Heck, most of the time they didn’t even tell me where we were going.  I got a text the night before.  (virgo, cap rising - steadfast, premeditated, strategic).  My mantra for all 14 days was ~ surrender.

When can I tell people?  The funny thing here is that everyone I asked, anyone I asked, had a very different answer.  The possibility of error was maddening.  The PBS USA office said, I could reveal anything five minutes after they did.  The sole caveat was that the photos I shared could not include the crew.  So that’s what I did.  Remember, I have not seen the show.  It was all like describing a gift before you open it.  In tiny increments, PBS USA revealed this and that.  I followed their lead.

Breathe.  Show and Tell.  I was hoping to meet Sonia Johnson again.  I had not seen her for 36 years.  We parted in the Springfield airport and neither of us was well.  Though I didn’t realize it at the time, I was not just saying goodbye to my sister fasters but also our standing guard.  AND goodbye to the ERA.

Finally, Day 14.  There she was.  – you will have to watch to get the whole story as I traveled to 5 states, recapitulated my summer of 1982, and met up with my Mentor.

PBS, We'll Meet Again
Tuesday, January, 8,  9/8c

CEDAW & International Women’s Day Redux @City Council

People asked me if I would speak on LEU. No, there are over 100 people who do that. Besides, this is one of 32 days in the USA calendar year that is legislatively assigned to raising women out of invisibility.

 

Tomorrow is International Women’s Day. Millions of women and girls all over the world will be celebrating, protesting, demonstrating, gathering to bring attention to:

• Educating girls
  
• Protecting women & girls from rape and sexual assault
  
  
• Raising women to positions in leadership

 

It is two years ago tonight I spoke to you about CEDAW; The UN Conventions on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women. That night you voted unanimously to “study it.” I am interested in that study.

 

In those two years, The United Sates has fall from #75 in the world in Women in Leadership to #100. In those two years, 25 countries have advanced to surpass the USA in women in Leadership. (total of 194 countries)

 

Two years ago, I invited you to get ahead of the curve. Tonight I am just asking you to get on the curve. #metoo #timesup As of today, there are 34 CEDAW Cites, 11 are in California. There are many reports you can inspect and amend.

 

I am interested in that report you voted on. I hope you take up my interest. It would be nice to see one of the four councilwomen take this up. Maybe it would be even more interesting if one of the men did. Either way,

 

Happy International Women’s Day.

Proclamation for Juana

Here is what did not happen last night.  The Long Beach City Council did not present Juana Melara a proclamation congratulating her on being one of Time Magazine’s Person of the Year.  You might wonder why, let me answer with her quote from the speaker’s podium:

“Being #TIME’s person of the year is an honor that should be shared by the entire city, we shouldn’t be ignored and voted down by the city council” -Juana Melara  

That’s right.  On September 19^th, the council voted 5 – 4 against protecting the city’s hospitality workers, both on workload and assault protections.  There were many reasons, not the least of which was, ….well… Grand Prix.  I mean no one wants to see a sign in the hotel lobby that there is zero tolerance for sexual harassment and assault.  It would be a total buzz kill. 

When Agenda #20 came up for consideration and comment, several people from Clergy and Laity United for Economic Justice, LAANE and BHC lined up to speak.  As I told the council, item #20 would be a fine recommendation if this was 1999; a thought validated by the New York Times article this morning, (Sexual Harassment Training Doesn’t Work. But Some Things Do). 

One of the council women proudly announced that the answer is training women to defend themselves and that many hotels offer the very course taught to the police.  The assumption that a woman can even breathe through an assault in a closed hotel room while a man twice her size corners her or ties her up with the vacuum cord is outrageous.  It is immoral. 

The public commenters began, mostly women.  The last woman talked about her deep emotional response to the fact that her personal assault testimony on September 19^th had zero impact on the council.  In this context both Councilwoman Pearce and Councilwoman Gonzalez said the same thing.  As is mostly the case, two men spoke last.  One was concerned that with all these, “new genders,” he hoped this was not just about women.  The last speaker said he was particularly interested that we did not dismiss Police Chief Luna’s testimony that there have only been 1 or 2 reports of such workplace  assaults in 5 years.   

Councilwoman Price took the floor.  She began discussing bullying.  She accused the public speakers of bullying the council and that it is time for women to stand together. 

To break this down a bit,

BULLYING occurs when a person ridicules another, which may or may not result in the bullied person being thrown in emotional or physical danger, certainly made afraid.  Let me assure you, the commenters were not bullying the council. 

Speaking for myself, I was doing precisely what my social justice mentors taught me.  Alice Paul, Rosa Parks, Grace Lee Boggs, Ella Baker all taught us to EMBARRASS those in power by making the power differential clear.  Nothing could be further from bullying.  In fact, the bullying was in the opposite direction, as we were supposed to crawl away thinking that we better not offer proud and clear voices again.

Several of us begin speaking truth to power in the ‘60’s.  I began with George Wallace and my most recent was Barack Obama.  Frankly, the Vietnam war ended and DADT was reversed, the little pebble I offered in these massive mosaics validated my mentors’ methods. 

Secondly, Councilwoman Price made a plea for unity among women.  Don’t ask me to unify with those who are bullying me.  I would ask you to unify with me in standing in front of a hotel with a picket sign in solidarity with the Housekeepers.  Unity begins with supporting those who have the least power.  You have the direction in reverse.  Please bring your privilege and power to them, proclaim them the real heroines in the #metoo movement and join with Time Magazine in congratulating them on breaking the silence.  Bring them their City Proclamation. 

Finally, when the council chamber was almost empty, 15 or so people lined up with little pink signs to demand the recall of Councilwoman Pearce.  90% men listed their bullish reasons to demand this recall.  No one is fooled by this.  Silence.  Grave, deafening silence.  Where was the unity between women?  Was there too much to risk?  This was the time for women to unite.

 

The Quieting of the American Conscience

Conscience by Vincent van Gogh

18 hours later and, with the rising sun, the fog on the windows of the mind is clearing.  I always knew Donald was like that.  It always showed.  Move along, there is nothing new here. 

Conscious women, can I say feminist women, saw it when he divorced Ivana or Marla or dismissed Melania or man-handled Ivanka.  We saw it on the Apprentice.  We saw it with his sons and the slaughter of big game in Africa.  We saw it with his disregard for Trump workers.  With his succession of bankruptcies.  With his opulence.  With his hair, tan and oddly long ties.  With behavior that would send a second grader to the principal’s office and a sophomore to detention.  We have always seen it. 

I think the pain of this explosive revelation that Farenthold facilitated and Access Hollywood with Billy Bush withheld, lies in the slow boil of it all.  How did everyone NOT see it from the start?  That is the immorality of it all.  What has happened to the quieting of the American Conscience? 

What has happened in the pulpit where cash is grabbed and, in some cases, little boys and girls.  What has happened in textbooks in the tacit removal of the mistreatment of the indigenous people, African people, Chinese people, women in total – too many to list.  And we celebrate these atrocities naming them Columbus day or Thanksgiving day.  And, of course, Women’s Equality day which is a titular lie. 

We have sent the Elders into substandard silos of dismissal.  We have used white-out on our Story-Tellers.  We have hidden the suffering and poor who remind us of the calling to generosity and lie in stark contrast under blue tarps with their only loved one, their dog.  We arrest indiscriminately and it appears that the overcrowding of prisons is being solved with outright assassinations on the street.  We medicate people into dysfunction.  We surround cemeteries with fences to promote the worst illusion of all, immortality.

And now we will simplify this boiling pot.  We will tar and feather.  We will drag through the street.  We will make ourselves righteous by vilifying in short and long term public shaming.  When after all it was you and me. 

Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul to waste.

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name

I shouted out,
Who killed the Kennedys?
When after all
It was you and me

Let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name
But what's confusing you
Is just the nature of my game

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails
Just call me Lucifer
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint

So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
Use all your well-learned politesse
Or I'll lay your soul to waste,

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name

It isn’t that I believe in the devil.
I believe in Art.
Thank you Keith and Mick

2016 Platform Hearing Testimony

Zoe Nicholson
@onlinewithzoe
http://ERAOnceandForAll.com

2016 Democratic Party Platform Hearing
US Constitution

It is unimaginable that I have been writing to the US Congress about the Equal Rights Amendment for 36 years.  It is really nothing compared to the primary author, Alice Paul, who lobbied to her dying day at age 92.  She lobbied for the ERA for 54 years.  And, now, we are on a new precipice of electing a President who is not going to be included in the US Constitution which means she is not required to serve jury duty, pay taxes or allowed to run for president.  Obviously, she had better address this astounding discrepancy January 22, 2017.

As you can see from the extended footnote below¹  I am well aware that my party, the Democratic Party, has been including a call for both the ERA & CEDAW for many years. 

The point is not to INCLUDE it.  The point is to ENACT it.

Now that it is well documented that 94% of Americans believe women should be included in the US Constitution, the questions are

1. How many Americans believe Women are already included in the Constitution?
2. What is the course of action needed to ratify the Amendment?

Strategy ONE

• Introduce it early (Sen. Kennedy used to on March 22.)
• Hold Hearings in the Committee before it gets sent down the pipeline of subcommittees
• Bring the bill to the floor(s)
• Send to the states for ratification
• Push it through state legislations for a super-majority

Strategy TWO

• Introduce bill to delete section 3 of the 1972 ERA applying an artificial deadline
• Pass bill
• Ratify in 3 of the remaining 15 unratified states

Obviously this entire plan rests on these two cornerstones:

• DO MORE THAN ENDORSE THE ERA IN THE 2016 PLATFORM
• TURN CONGRESS BLUE and ELECT the Democratic nominee for President.

As Mrs Burn told her son Harry, August 18, 1920

Dear Son:
Hurrah and vote for suffrage! Don't keep them in doubt! I notice some of the speeches against. They were bitter. I have been watching to see how you stood, but have not noticed anything yet. Don't forget to be a good boy and help Mrs Cattt put the "rat" in ratification.
Your mother

In your Service,

Zoe Nicholson

Founder ERA Once and For All
June 17, 2016

   ^1.2012 Democratic Party Platform

Moving America Forward
Protecting Rights and Freedoms

Civil Rights. We believe in an America where everybody gets a fair shot and everybody plays by the same set of rules. At the core of the Democratic Party is the principle that no one should face discrimination on the basis of race, ethnicity, national origin, language, religion, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, or disability status. Democrats support our civil rights statutes and we have stepped up enforcement of laws that prohibit discrimination in the workplace and other settings. We are committed to protecting all communities from violence. We are committed to ending racial, ethnic, and religious profiling and requiring federal, state, and local enforcement agencies to take steps to eliminate the practice, and we continue to support enforcement of Title VI. We are committed to equal opportunity for all Americans and to making sure that every American is treated equally under the law.

"Because of ‘Don't Ask, Don't Tell,' each time I went off to war, no one was at the armory to say goodbye. No one was waiting at the airport when I returned. My partner, George Di Salvo, and I started a family five years ago by adopting two wonderful boys. But I kept their existence secret, because that's what the law required. Not anymore, however. Thanks to the unyielding efforts of President Obama, I can serve my country openly and proudly with my family by my side."—Dr. Vito Imbasciani, Colonel, California National Guard, Medical Service Corps

We are committed to ensuring full equality for women: we reaffirm our support for the Equal Rights Amendment, recommit to enforcing Title IX, support the Paycheck Fairness Act, and will urge ratification of the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women. We know that putting America back to work is Job One, and we are committed to ensuring that Americans do not face employment discrimination. We support the Employment Non- Discrimination Act because people should not be fired based on their sexual orientation or gender identity.

President Obama and the Democratic Party are committed to ensuring all Americans are treated fairly. This administration hosted the first-ever White House Conference on Bullying Prevention and we must continue our work to prevent vicious bullying of young people and support LGBT youth. The President's record, from ending "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" in full cooperation with our military leadership, to passing the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act, to ensuring same-sex couples can visit each other in the hospital, reflects Democrats' belief that all Americans deserve the same chance to pursue happiness, earn a living, be safe in their communities, serve their country, and take care of the ones they love. The Administration has said that the word ‘family' in immigration includes LGBT relationships in order to protect bi-national families threatened with deportation.

Women. President Obama—the son of a single mother and the father of two daughters—understands that women aren't a special interest group. They are more than half of this country, and issues that affect women also affect families. That is why the first bill he signed into law was the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act, which helps women fight back when they are paid less than men, and why we continue to fight to overcome Republican opposition and pass the Paycheck Fairness Act to help stop gender discrimination in pay before it starts. And that is why the Justice Department and Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, led by President Obama's appointees, have investigated and prosecuted numerous violations of the nation's civil rights laws, and obtained more than $140 million in relief for victims of gender discrimination. We Democrats will continue to support efforts to ensure that workers can combat gender discrimination in the workplace and to protect women against pregnancy discrimination. And that's why we support passing the Healthy Families Act, broadening the Family and Medical Leave Act, and partnering with states to move toward paid leave.

We understand that economic issues are women's issues, and the challenges of supporting and raising a family are often primarily a woman's responsibility. That's why putting Americans back to work is Job One. That's why the Affordable Care Act especially helps women by guaranteeing they and their families won't become uninsured when they lose their jobs. That's why this administration strengthened Medicare and Medicaid for millions of women and families. And that's why the Affordable Care Act is ending health insurance discrimination against women, and provides women with free access to preventive care, including prenatal screenings, mammograms, cervical cancer screening, breast-feeding supports, and contraception.

"I know firsthand the injustice of gender discrimination in pay: for years I was paid less than my male colleagues, and it took an anonymous note from a colleague to tip me off to the fact that I was being denied equal pay for equal work. I also know firsthand that President Obama takes these issues seriously: the first bill that he signed into law was focused on making sure that other women don't face the same injustice. While the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act won't change my story, I couldn't be prouder of the legislation that bears my name, and I know who is standing up for women and families."—Lilly Ledbetter

We understand that women's rights are civil rights. That's why we reaffirm our support for the ERA, recommit to enforcing Title IX, and will urge ratification of the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women. That's why we are committed to ending violence against women, why Vice President Joe Biden originally wrote and championed the Violence Against Women Act during his time in the Senate, and why we support reauthorizing and strengthening it now.

The President and the Democratic Party believe that women have a right to control their reproductive choices. Democrats support access to affordable family planning services, and President Obama and Democrats will continue to stand up to Republican efforts to defund Planned Parenthood health centers. The Affordable Care Act ensures that women have access to contraception in their health insurance plans, and the President has respected the principle of religious liberty. Democrats support evidence-based and age-appropriate sex education.

May 14, 1982 I Thought the ERA was Ours.

This is my diary entry from Friday, May 14, 1982.  It is the opening chapter of my book, The Hungry Heart, which is the actual diary of my 40 days in Springfield, Illinois.  Phyllis and Ellie, NOW v Eagles; Equality was on the line and still is.  Many of us who are working on the election of the first woman president are hoping that it will renew a bright light on Constitutional equality.  I mean after all, the president should be included in the US Constitution.  

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

La igualdad de los derechos bajo ley no sera negada ni sera abreviada por los Estados Unidos o por cualquier estado a causa de sexo.

Equality of Rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex. 

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

MAY 14, 1982
This is something I want so much, I am willing to die for it.  The fact that I want it for all women for all time makes it profound and suffocating.  I feel like I am being crushed inside a storm of feelings, fears and certainty.  I need some relief.  I know this is the right thing to do.  Food, cigarettes, privacy, pets, home and family -- take it.  I want this more. 

All I did was answer the phone.  It sounded like every other ring that had called me to the phone.  It rang in early May.  It was Sonia Johnson calling.  We had met in the Fall when she came to my bookstore to sign her book, “From Housewife to Heretic.”  We talked of the deadline for the Equal Rights Amendment, July 1, and promised one another that no matter what we did we would do it together.  "We are going to fast for the ERA,"  Sonia calmly explained to me.  "We are going to go to Illinois, sit in the Springfield rotunda, live on water only and win the ERA." 

I met Dina at the Long Beach airport at 8 A.M.  I think we are doing awfully well considering we both stopped smoking just four days ago.  Maybe in the face of not eating, not smoking seems negligible.  At least it seems to be just another task on my ToDo list.  With an extra hour before the flight, we had breakfast.  It was the first in the continuing series of meals we ate today.  Eggs, Pancakes, Toast, O.J., Coffee.  We ate as if there is no tomorrow. 

The flight to Chicago was uneventful but we missed the connecting flight to Springfield.  It took three attempts at stand-by to actually make it.  The good news is that we were able to eat another meal; packing it away like chipmunks in Fall. 

A thoughtful woman named Marion picked us up.  She is studying to be a Methodist minister.  She made the mistake of asking us if there was anything we wanted to do before we went to the meeting place.  Fried Shrimp, Baked potatoes, Blue cheese salad, Pie, Coffee.

The mystery of where we are going to stay is solved.  We have permission to stay at Kumler Methodist Church for two weeks.   We are going to sleep on the floor of the Sunday School classrooms.  The desks and chairs are itsy bitsy.  The bathroom is down right comical as the sinks and toilets are all scaled down.  The really bad news is that there are no showers.  I am really taken back about no showers.  It is muggy May in Southern Illinois.

The classrooms are stifling.  I guess they only open the windows on Sunday mornings.  The walls are covered with posters of Jesus.  This is not the Jesus I love.  This one is fair skinned, sandy hair, manicured hands, sweet little smile.  The pictures show him surrounded with pastel covered, adoring fans.  This is not the dissident, powerful, charismatic carpenter I would like to know. 

Dina and I are the first to arrive.  The other women are due in an hour or so.  They are driving from D.C. and Virginia, where they have been stumping on the ERA trail.  This is giving me too much time to sit and stew and get really scared.  I can hear Dina in the next room; she must be recording her journal.  I am stuffed but wonder  what will happen if I don’t have food for forty-four days.  Maybe it won’t take forty-four days.  I’m hungry.

What if no one cares?  What if there is no press coverage?  If I was the opposition I would deflate this by ignoring it, trivializing it or even mocking it.  But I have to remember that there is a magnificent precedent for fasting.  Most of my favorite people have fasted.  My heart says I have no choice. 

I hear the others have arrived.  Maybe they have some food. 

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
To purchase a copy of The Hungry Heart
Lune Soleil Press